HIGHER EDUCATION:

Mike Hendrix alerts us to one of the more reprehensible vermin on this earth, much less in this Country. And, wouldn't you know it? He's a professor of History at Saint Xavier University.

ONE MORE THING:

I think last night's overwhelming affirmation of an anti-Democratic agenda means that I should never again have to hear "Bush -- the President-select, not elect" or any other such tripe. In fact, the next time anyone mentions a comparable distortion of the facts I think it would be perfectly within the bounds of respectability to suggest a return to the system of duelling. This, of course would be a terrible mismatch since the incensed Rebublican would likely choose a gun while the misguided, non-Republican would probably choose ... I don't know ... a Hacky-Sack? In any case, such historical revisionism should finally go by the wayside now that the Jeffords-betrayal has been corrected and the Republican majority that America elected in the first place has been restored ... at least until Lincoln Chaffe bugs out.

TOP TEN EXCUSES WE'LL NEVER HEAR FROM DEMOCRATS AS TO WHY THE GOP WON:

(10) MacAuliffe, Daschle and Gephardt are such doofuses its a wonder anybody votes Democrat.

(9) The Country really has shifted too far to the Left ... it was just time for a much-needed adjustment back towards reality.

(8) Barbra (and Hollywood in general) has entirely too much influence on the direction of the party, considering the fact that not one of them knows a damn thing about anything other than being a fake.

(7) Fucking Florida voters! I mean come on. What do we have to do? Put freaking Geritol and Ginko Biloba in the damn water to get y'all to pay attention when you vote!?!

(6) Bill and Hillary ... 'nuf said!

(5) Maybe we took a wrong turn in embracing Al Sharpton as the newest and brightest "leader" of the African-American constituency ... or was it when we gave so much credence to Jesse "No More Hymie-Town" Jackson?

(4) The Republicans just have the better vision for the future of this Country and we really can't offer anything better than "socialized medicine" and "social security for everyone!" and "Republicans are mean."

(3) After the Soviet Union fell it was only a matter of time before socialism took a backseat in America. Oh well, 100 years wasn't such a bad run!

(2) The people have spoken! Money in their own pockets is better than money in the government's pocket.

(1) That George Bush is so smart ... [ed. note: this phrase in and of itself is so incredibly unlikely that any completion of the sentence automatically qualifies for first place]

Since great minds will differ, email me any improvements on my list and they will be posted.

DAILY QUOTE:

"The first duty of society is to give each of its members the possibility of fulfilling his destiny. When it becomes incapable of performing this duty it must be transformed."
- Alexis Carrel, Reflections on Life